May 16, 2006

• Yesterday

  May 15, 2006 - Monday, late at night

  Hey Babe,

      As of today, I've been muddling through life without you for a year.  I thought today would be the hardest of all for me, but instead, it was the days prior that were the roughest......I guess because I couldn't stop remembering how hard life was for you last spring.  Today though, I thought mostly about the ever so many, ever so happy times we had together.

      In fact, the worst part of the entire day was that I had to get up by that obnoxious alarm clock this morning.  Yeah, I still hate that contraption, but your mom was coming at noon and some things never change:  If I wanna be awake by noon, I’ve gotta get up by 9 at the latest.  Plus, there was the usual chore of de-hairing the chairs to do -- so Mamaw wouldn’t have to sit on big boufs of Buster hair when she got here.

      Amazingly, I caught myself singing while I ran the sweeper.  I couldn’t believe it.  Who would have thought I could sing about anything today?  But it was this silly little ditty from a TV commercial for Advantix.  Every time I see it, I think about how much you loved animals and how much they all loved you.  The star of this particular spot is a little puppy -- part yellow Lab, I think -- and he’s prancing around wearing his bandana, accompanied by a “doggie” voice-over singing,

      “There ain’t no bugs on me; there ain’t no bugs on me! 
      There may be bugs on some a’you mugs but there ain’t no bugs on me!” 

      Anyway, I figured you’d probably smile at the song -- and probably laugh at me for singing it.

      (Not to worry -- I remember.  There ain’t no bugs on any of our critters either.  I still make sure that Sadie, Angel, Lexi and Buster get their Revolution regularly.  Right on time, every single month -- it’s on the calendar!  Since old Diablo Whiney Wolf is hanging with you now, I figure we're covered from every angle.)

      You know, of course, why your mom came to visit today.......she wanted me to take her down to Shiloh to visit your grave.  Yeah, I know you’re not there -- but you’ve gotta admit it’s still a pretty good place to leave flowers for you.  I went out early and cut a whole bunch of the purple Iris that grow on the far side of the old garage for you....they’ve been absolutely gorgeous this year!  But when Mamaw got here, she had a teeny tiny bouquet of baby roses clutched ever so tightly in her hand.  I could see that it was important for her to be the one to bring you flowers on this day.  So I divided the Irises and left some for your dad and some for Grandmother Lula and Granddaddy Richard instead.  When the Hibiscus comes in bloom -- which’ll be pretty shortly now -- I’ll leave some of those for you, okay? 

      (Btw, you noticed I got your Crepe Myrtle transplanted last fall, right?  I put it out front near the road, exactly where you thought it should go.  It hasn’t bloomed yet, but it sure is growing like gang-busters!)

      Ralph and Carol came today, too.  Ralph hemmed and hawed and mumbled something about not wanting me to be alone today.  It made me remember how you and I always marveled at his big old gnarly heart.  He misses you.  We all miss you. For awhile there last November, Ralph came awfully close to joining you, but finally got to feeling better and opted to stick around here a bit longer.  Sometimes he needs to use a cane now though, so I hunted up that crazy thing you bought just before you died and gave it to him.  Remember?  It comes apart for folding and then snaps back together when you shake it?  And just like you, Ralph thought it was the coolest!  I swear......boys and their toys.

      Today was gray and cold for this time of year.  Only 50 degrees, I think someone said.  My kind of weather, but you’d have said it was freezing and that we needed a fire for sure.  And it looked like rain all day long, but none ever came. 

      Tomorrow the sun is supposed to shine again, so I’ll probably cut asparagus and then mow some.  Good night, Lindsey.  I love you.

  P.S.  Since I was gone a good part of the day, Buster was certain that he was being starved.  Rotten cat demanded three helpings of supper!

  
  Diablo, Lin, & Sadie

  • 4:03 pm
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