March 31, 2007
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Headlines from the Toad Hall Times
• Fifi Fights Jungle Behind Garage…And WINS. Sees Back of Garage for First Time in Years!
• Toad Hall Farm Loses Two Trees To Wind – Chain Saw Massacre Imminent
• 2007 Burn Pile Tops 2006 by 5 Feet 3 Inches So Far
• First Asparagus of the Year Pops Up Weeks Early!
• Sick Maple Can Be Saved With Buckets of Money Says Tree Doc
• 70-Year-Old Sewing Machine Repaired Just In Time For Amazing Grace’s Sun dress
• Asbestos Suit Proves Handy for Fighting Poison Ivy
• Richard and Lula Hollytree Get Fed and Treated for Black Spot
• Fence Row In Danger of Being Covered by Polk
• Goddammed Mower Clogs Every Three Feet In Thick Grass On Banks
• Giant Black Dog Digs Unnecessary Foundation for Equally Unnecessary Second Home
• Wanted: Clean Dirt
• Fifi O’Toole 0 — Weeds 2,137
• Unexpected Rain Causes Grass to Grow Three Feet. Overnight!
• 2006 Tax Forms Missing — Psychic To Be Called In
• Birds Invite Relatives Over — Crowd Consumes 40 Pounds of Sunflower Seed In One Week!
• Woman Plans Heist On Vet Pharmacy
• 60-Year-Old Leak In Back Room Still Leaking
• Bodinski Home Brew Arrives Via US Mail — Enclosed Note Warns Against Drinking
• “THE KID” & Family In Danger of Being Evicted by Toys — Seek Larger Living Quarters
• Princess Prissy Changes Name to “Young Mother Hubbard” During Weekdays
• Easter Bunny Assists Fifi In Keeping The Ends From Meeting– 30 -
—————————–Correction Notice:
Due to an error by our proofreader, Fifi O’Toole, one of yesterday’s headlines was printed incorrectly. Princess Prissy has NOT changed her name to “Young Mother Hubbard” during weekdays. She has, however, changed her name to “The Young Woman Who Lived In A Shoe.” During weekdays. Or weak days, as the case may be,
Fifi O’Toole has been suffering lately from entirely too much fresh air and sunshine. We apologize for any inconvience that her error may have caused.
Comments (23)
Yummy, I actually like asparugus… I know I’m a bit weird. I assume you to do since it is growing.
Have a wonderful weekend.
Tricia
I love your headlines. You can cut, trim, edit, paste and have my Toad Hall headline if you need a masthead. (We’ll both be shocked if that link works.)
Since you dominated the jungle, could you come take care of mine?
Clever making the last dot (before Easter) egg shaped.
Princess Prissy and highonprine would like to lay claim to any asparagus you may feel the need to remove from Toad Hall. We will travel to pick up.
This is a great idea: the news stories. I may steal it.
I’m glad you posted. My dog has missed getting waked up by my snickers while reading.
I’m here from coffeeiv’s site and glad I came. I giggled and giggled to myself as I sat here at my parents house, mom putting a puzzle together, dad watching the Cardinals lose and I on my laptop. (My hubs is a trucker and out of town. ) Mom came over to see what I was giggling at and she read every one and laughed too! Thanks.
Those leaks only get better with age.
Do not burn poison ivy.
RYC: No, I didn’t know that. And in order to prove it, I’ll have to come to a Missouri forest. Know where one’s at??
(I just finished “Chapter 1 Desire: Sweetness / Plant: The Apple.” “Chapter 3 Desire: Intoxication / Plant: Marijuana” comes later.)
RYC: He does have good hair–probably spends a thousand a day on it too! But he deserves it!
Do you mean that another grandchild is on the way?
Asparagus is very nearly my favorite food.
Love your headlines! I must try growing asparagus again. The last time I put in a 30 foot long bed of the stuff, the sheep got in and ate it right down to ground level so many times they eventually killed the roots.
RYC, it’s a gift. I take no credit for my native nerdiness.
LOL! Love the headlines! I’m afraid of my yard.
My sis-in-law has a neighbor who is trying to sell her house. THe tree doc prescribed (and administered) tree IV’s. Not enough iron…wonder if I could get a carry-around IV filled with iron…I’d have so much more energy!
I love this! If you lived near me, I’d sell you my big honkin’ house. I’m sick of it.
I love your headlines!
ryc
is that what it is Feef?
RYC: Me neither.
RYC: “Under the Bleachers.” No, that’s a great title! I would make it an expose of working conditions in the Clorox factory!
ryc
No comment and no new entry!
You’re all about NO these days Feef!
I’m gonna start callin’ ya madame NOah.
grin
Well glad you got all that straightened out… that warm weather can do that. Of course, ours is cold today… yuk!
Hugs, Tricia
RYC: I’m so glad my post was of help to you–that brought me a big smile. I did something of service today, and I’m humbled.
I have also been whooped by weeds. In fact, I just remarked to my neighbor a week and a half ago that if I were trying to grow weeds, I’d be very successful. I don’t know what else is in the yard but I do feel like I’m being watched by something living in the zebra grass. Perhaps one of these days I should poke around in there with a stick?