May 14, 2007

• A Second Stab at Featured Grown-Ups Content

  If I knew then whut I know now......

    1.)  I’d have been EVER so much kinder to my knees and my hands.

    2.)  I’d have been the smartest young chick on the planet....

    3.)  ...and no one my age would have hung out with me because of my superior intelligence.

    4.)  I’d have asked for less and given more.

    5.)  Disclaimer to #4:  Except at work, where I habitually gave too much.

    6.)  I’d have been more courageous and less fearful about life in general.  And I'd have kicked that thing called "worry" in the shins.

    7.)  I’d never have let the bastards get me down.

    8.)  I wouldn’t have stayed married to Bozo the Clown for 13 years.  In fact, I wouldn’t have married him in the first place.  (Which would be a very BAD thing because then I would not have “Princess Prissy and THE KID.”  Or the four precious grands they’ve given me.)  

    9.)  I’d wouldn’t have tried so hard to be Super Woman or been so loathe to admit that I wasn’t.

  10.)  I’d never have spent 30 years in a sleep-deprived state of existence.

  11.)  I’d have said “no” (kindly but firmly) much more often when someone else’s request of me caused an enormous hardship.

  12.)  I’d have realized that no one was ever gonna ask to eat off my floors....hence, less floor scrubbing.

  13.)  I’d have forgiven my mother for her alcoholism much earlier in life.

  14.)  Although I’ve always included an enormous variety of folks in my “circle of friendship,” I’d have made it even bigger and included lots more

  15.)  And finally, if I had known then whut I know now, I wouldn’t have been me.  I’d have been someone else.  And hey!  Who knows if I even would’ve liked that person?  There are some things one just shouldn't mess with, see?  That's my story and I'm stickin' TO it.

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  • 10:16 am
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