June 21, 2007

• I'm just sittin' on a fence....

  .....you could say I've got no sense.  And you'd be righter than rain.

      Here's the thing.  I drive a 1999 Batmobile.  It's beautiful, it's EVER so much fun to drive, goes like the wind, has a T-Top and only 58,000 miles on the odometer...which ain't half bad for a '99. 

      Plus -- Lindsey adored this car.

  

      BUT.  It's not so very practical....with me living out here at the edge of the earth and frequently needing to haul stuff home from the other edge of the earth.

      So I've been pondering on trading it in.

      Maybe on this one.....

  

    The Cruiser, at least, has a little style -- meaning it doesn't look
  like every other car on the road these days. And it has real decent
  cargo space.  And leg room in the back.  And four doors, which is
  kinda' important when you have grands to pick up for Easter Dinners at
  Mamaw's.  Best of all, it has rack & pinion steering, which totally
  makes me wag.  Plus, maybe I could get some flames painted on the sides, huh?  That'd be fun!

      So I like the Cruiser.   But surprisingly, it doesn't get much
  better gas mileage than the Batmobile.  Only 3 miles more around town,
  even though it's a  4-cylinder-16-valve jobby.  And too, it's made in Mexico, which the U.S. might as well annex, but hasn't.  Yet.

      Okay, so then maybe instead, trade the Batmobile for this one.......

  

      The Vibe gets WAY better gas mileage than either the Batmobile or the Cruiser.  But it costs more and let's face it -- the style's nothing to write home about.  BOR-ing!  Still, it has even more cargo space than the Cruiser.  And it's a Pontiac.  Ever since they quit making Gremlins I've had this thing about Pontiacs, see?

      Sigh.  I'm trying SO hard to step out of character for just once in my life and do something practical.  Because it would be really smart to do that.

      But every time I look out the window and think of the Batmobile not being there any more, I get all sad & mopey.

      And then I think about the strange looks I get when I roar up in the Batmobile and get out and see all these young girls' faces drop three feet because they were expecting some hot, young & studly dude instead of an graying old hippie chick.

      And then I think about how Aidan the Pensive LOVES Fifi's car!

      And then I think about how lifting 50-pound sacks of dawg food up and OVER the back end to get it in the trunk is not something I'm gonna wanna to do forever.

      And THEN, every-once-in-awhile,  another  icky thought creeps in -- like how Lin's 1981 DeLorean is almost ready to drive again and is also impractical as hell for someone like me.  And how it's gonna hafta go, too.

      It's all revolving around and around in my head on an endless loop and I'm annoyed beyond zebra with thinking about it all -- and not being able to think of anything else. 

      And not being able to decide.

      If only this were 1902.  Then I could just get a horse. 

      But wait -- I'd still have to decide on which horse, wouldn't I?  Nevermind.

      Is there any point to all this indecisive rambling?   Well, only proof positive that I am an airhead in the first degree.

      But as for hauling out a hoard of "Blonde" jokes, forget it.  Because my hair's been every color but.

  • 3:59 pm
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